Zumba-ness

I have a friend named Rachel--a friend since grade 4.
That's being friends for about 20 years, maybe even more.
She recently made me go to a Zumba class
And sure enough, in there, I was the only fat ass.

Her mom was the Zumba teacher
And I really should've just watched from a bleacher
But, my friend from childhood I had to support
So I shook and danced and drank water by the quart.

They had a big long mirror posted to the wall
So you could beautifully capture every embarrassing fall.
My fatty rolls and breasts were flailing about
And all I could think of is "I need to get the hell out!!"

I'm pretty sure Zumba is not for me.
I think it's only for people who have bra cups the size of B.

So...all for my friend, I lost my dignity and pride
while dancing to skanky music and turning to the wrong side.
But, I'd do it all again for my awesome and fun pal
Because that's what friends do--they support their best gal!